Episode Summary
Send an anonymous text messageDr. Ed Daube, senior psychologist with 32 years of experience at the California Youth Authority, joins us for an eye-opening conversation about the true nature of emotions and how to master them. Drawing from decades of clinical expertise, Dr. Daube dismantles the common myth that emotions control us, revealing instead how we can strategically work with our emotional responses.The emotions cycle begins with our brain's constant scanning for threats—a hardwired survival mechanism. When the amygdala perceives danger, it triggers physical responses before we're even consciously aware of feeling anything. But unlike our cave-dwelling ancestors who faced primarily physical dangers, most modern threats are psychological. This is where mastery becomes possible: by physically stepping back and taking a deep breath, we create space to assess whether the perceived threat is real before choosing our response.Dr. Daube makes a fascinating distinction between anger's validity and justification. Our anger is always valid because it reflects our perception, but it may not be justified if based on misunderstanding. He explores the spectrum from mild annoyance to full rage, noting how our capacity for rational choice diminishes as intensity increases. Particularly illuminating is his research on women's anger, revealing how society often forces women to find indirect ways to express and address legitimate grievances without facing labels like "difficult" or "emotional."For teenagers struggling with anger management, Dr. Daube offers practical wisdom: if your anger creates more problems than it solves, it's time to step back and examine what perceived threats are triggering your reactions. The key insight? Nothing outside ourselves "makes" us angry—our perception creates the emotional response, putting the power and responsibility for emotional mastery squarely in our hands.Ready to transform your relationship with anger? Visit emotionsdoctor.com or check out Dr. Dalby's book "Beyond Anger Management: Master Your Anger as a Strategic Tool" on Amazon to continue your journey toward emotional intelligence.To learn more about Dr. Ed Daube, please click on the link below.TheEmotionsDoctor.comSupport the showIf you are hearing impaired, have data limitations, or connectivity challenges, we made a Podcast Blog just for you! To learn more about what I do besides podcasting, please visit https://www.FatimaBey.worldIf you have any comments, topic suggestions, or would like to be a guest on the show, please go to:https://www.MindShiftPowerPodcast.worldFollow me on social mediahttps://smartlink.metricool.com/public/smartlink/fatimabeythemindshifterSubscribe to my YouTube channel, where you will find 200+ videos of my words of wisdom and life lessons.https://www.youtube.com/@TheMindShifterThank you for listening.