The Dick Show
Dick Masterson
The Dick Show is a weekly science and rage based podcast where everything is a contest and there ams no rules--especially grammar rules. Chock-full of Dick Tips and the answers to questions like, 'Are you a rage?' and 'What even is a libertarian?' The Dick Show. Get some.
Inflatable Christmas ornaments, the millennial wealth gap, suicide threats, Chris the Kiwi gets laid and petitions Trump for amnesty and financial aid, DMT vs. God, Fatsmas Caroles gets flagged, fist bumps are the soy high-fives, Sean looks terrible, awful children who wrecked my parents house, I ruined the Mandalorian for everyone, and rebooting The Biggest Problem with Boogie2988; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Buying a bed, getting beaten by a girl, Denise McAllister on "What Men Want to Say About Women (But Can't)", period warnings, more on Destiny's polyamory, thinking is white supremacy, giving money to the homeless, getting someone's kid taken away, things filled all the way to the top, viral loads; all that and more this week on The Dick Show.

Red flag laws, the Cyber Truck, couch cushions sliding off the couch, Mister Metokur banned from Patreon and re-platformed on New Project 2, Wired interviews me about Destiny, Baby Yoda, the language of love, Borat and the media's effect on other people, Nick J. Fuentes calls in to talk about "white nationalism", Flat Holocaust theory, and not beating off; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Celebrities in video games, autistic movie screenings, being done with all my Christmas shopping, Epstein is the Challenger explosion for Zoomers, Sean liked Chaggot, a virgin wins the Virgin Contest, ThinkSpot is released, what to do in the event of a school shooting, CBD cookies, bisexual girls, Nickelodeon pedophiles, criminal nudity, vaping apps, backing into parking spots, feedback theft, how to be a Mexican Joker, and an impeachment of the show; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

My new bank, the poorly officiated and disappointing Logan Paul/KSI fight, slippery dress shoes, sportsmanship, the TPUSA meltdown, Ethan Ralph from The Ralph Retort is in studio, Sean says "we live in a society", a man called "Chaggot" presents his book about autism that has emojis in it and explains how he was arrested for meth and robbing a Gamestop, a Clown World prediction from the past, actual Nazis, how to make the first move on a girl, more on what makes you gay, the Dr. Phil commentary is up, and something called "The JQ"; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

The banks shut me down, another warning from Patreon, QR codes, lesbian art shows, how to party during Daylight Savings Time, the limits of what is not gay, FWB contracts, how to have anal, John McAfee calls in about getting arrested, shooting guns, whales, and his new crypto exchange, Veronica LaVery is in-studio, emojis are replaced by pod Ellens, more stories from the front of the Alphabet War, and Shirley from Dr. Phil Calls in to talk about her lawsuit the deleted the tapes--which are now recovered; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

The Dr. Phil tapes are coming, Maddox pays his debt, Mental Jess plays #SlimeTime, men are barely funnier than women, the brain chemistry excuse, one more year until I'm dead, Vito has a card game, Jon who breaks bad news breaks bad news, Dame Pesos and Erik Wong have an argument, the civil war in Chile is a coincidence, Asterios comes clean on his $600 spite invoice, trans-bike riders vs. gorillas, Instagram filters, and ; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Paying my dad's social security, the Garbage-versary and the Garbages Goblin, men's experiences with men being emotional, over-crowded Halloween haunts, Cripp Daddy calls in to talk disabled Halloween costumes, back problems, avocado terrorism, things the army can fix, Ari gives a boob demonstration that I don't remember the point of and plays the war game, Hampture is under attack, pausing for ten minutes, more on #SlimeTime, and my own personal Asterios spaghetti week; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Maddox freaks out again for Spaghetti Week: Part Deux, children's duvets and the cucks who sleep in them, the Chinese Achilles heel of the invincible and the elite, Randy sends a long text, dating an older woman, Vic Lasagna loses his case, math is racist, "My Wife is Friends with a Pedophile's Wife", Nick Rekieta and his family are violently threatened by "Mad Black Atheist", a multiple felon and mentally challenged former gang member, what to do about a high voice, and a guy who was tricked into eating his own poop calls in to promote his new book; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

I get the side-eye for laughing at the wrong parts of Joker, committing to the bit, the Alphabet Wars heat up over trans-women and their penises, eyeball wiggles, letting 17-year-olds vote, The Cotton Ceiling, impeachment, leaving the door unlocked, the in-group preferences of white liberals, cereal bandits, and fellow Dr. Phil alum, Goose Wayne calls in; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Maker spaces ruined, poorly hidden packages, incels vs. The US Army, Maddox brags about stopping an imaginary mass shooter, Joey Salads calls in, how to break up with a girl, peeing over your own head, hazard lights, printed pictures look like garbage, Pedophastry and the scare of global warming, and Dame Pesos brings in a hidden recording of Mundane Matt caught on a hot mic talking about me; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Two days with gigantic balls, an Australian takes a trip down Crenshaw, being blessed, the going rate for Thoughts and Prayers, CBD, nanotech, women, and other scams, Zuby Music: the current British female deadlifting record holder, calls in, the legality of telling people to kill themselves, adventures in blackface, Ari has a post-op friend Sean would hit on, auto-continuing subscriptions, the best threesome position, how to fake being a black albino, the decline of nachos, Italian Americans, and Mundane Matt is not the father; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

A furry injects saline into my scrotum live on-air, students fight climate change but lose their vaping privileges, Mrs. Monopoly and other Mrs. boardgames, smoking in high school, sex positivity vs. sex negativity, modesty c*cks, how to have a three-way, Vito's school principal the pedophile, me not influencing a school shooting, science fairs, Stuttering John threatens to sue Karl from "Who Are These Podcasts", Maddox walks into a bar--and then immediately turns around and walks out, truckers passing one another at half a mile an hour, how much Boomers whine and complain about everything, and Sean chickens out of letting a furry inject saline into his scrotum. All that and more this week on The Dick Show!

The Autoblow machine, The Liquor Fairy and hitting a wall, the Sean Show, a tyranny of government occupational licensing fees, women and taxes, a prelude to a grand ball, inspiration vs. manipulation, a moon hoax, dating much younger girls, Hurricane Atlanta, giving my dad gas, Walmart stops selling bullets, the Taking Up Space Force, emotional intelligence, and a big stack of stripper ones; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

The AI Autoblow machine, a plague of consent ruins Burning Man, racist butterflies, falling asleep while driving, losing all your drugs, windshield stickers, a petition to lay a mother f*cker out, orbiters, another virgin contest winner, Fisher Price cameras for idiots, My Man grinds for gold, and obnoxious unpluggers; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

I'm at Burning Man. Awash in a sea of liquor and t*ts listening to the worst Boomer cover band in the world to use this WiFi.

Two hobbits steal 80s Girl's car and I sleep through it, the Yang Gang wants you to live in a trash can, Let's Talk About Suicide, fifty ways to secretly record your lover, Egg Clay Day, doubling down on a d*ck pic debt, how to disciprine, Crippled Jesus' strip club adventure,a Mumkey Jones sex tape review, back pain, racing automatic previews, sports for losers, and everything you know about obesity is wrong; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Epstein kills himself, butts invade America, IRL plot holes, Vito is in studio, white women f*ck dogs, my dad turns me into a bicycler, one in three women use Tindr for free food, millennials have no friends, the $100 Kiwi Chris threat bet, dick pics, why to bring a gun to school and create child pornography, and body acceptance double standards when it comes to the penis; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Losing the last ten pounds, the liquor sponge, the only gun argument you'll ever need, robot racism, The Bagel Boss calls in to talk about his various altercations, more on the moron Perception Gap, food expiry dates are destroying half of our food, Nick Rekieta calls in to talk Vic Lasagna odds, how to dump your girlfriend after she gets cancer, how to out-religious your parents, how to start a cult, and the notorious Eggy White; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Going Bald, Second Hand Drinking, Andy Signore