🌟 In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz explores a surprising truth that almost no one talks about: self-confidence alone can only take you so far. If you’ve ever worked hard to become more confident—only to still feel anxious, overwhelmed, or like the next level of life is somehow out of reach—this conversation will hit home. Dr. Aziz breaks down what he calls the self-confidence ceiling—the invisible limit you run into once you’ve taken risks, pushed yourself, built skills, and created a good life… and yet still feel anxious, grasping, or afraid of losing what you’ve built. Through stories of his own journey and powerful metaphors (the famous red, green, and gold balls), he reveals why success can sometimes increase anxiety, and what deeper ingredient is needed to finally feel grounded, secure, and free. You’ll discover why confidence without trust eventually collapses under its own weight, and why true liberation comes from pairing “believe in yourself” with something bigger: a lived sense of trust in life itself. This subtle shift unlocked a profound transformation in Dr. Aziz’s relationships, peace, and purpose—and it’s the core of his upcoming book Doubtless. Packed with insight, humor, and honest personal stories, this episode invites you into a new phase of growth—beyond performance, beyond proving yourself, and into a deeper kind of freedom. 🎧 Ready to break past your self-confidence ceiling and step into something greater? Tune in now and learn the missing piece that makes confidence finally feel effortless, stable, and real. ------------------------ When Self-Confidence Isn’t Enough There’s a moment in your growth when you look around at your life and think: “Shouldn’t I feel better than this?” You’ve worked hard. You’ve pushed yourself. You’ve taken the risks, had the breakthroughs, improved your relationships, built your career, maybe even created a life that younger you never thought was possible. And yet… the anxiety doesn’t fully go away. It shifts. It takes on a new shape. That’s what this episode dives into—the surprising point where self-confidence stops being enough, and why so many high-functioning, self-aware people suddenly feel overwhelmed, afraid, or “on edge” right when life gets good.

In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz dives into one of the most subtle yet powerful patterns that drives social anxiety and people-pleasing: the fear of other people’s feelings. Ever find yourself unable to say no, worrying you’ve upset someone, or constantly trying to make sure everyone feels okay, even at your own expense? This episode exposes the hidden contract behind those patterns: the belief that you’re responsible for managing other people’s emotional states. Whether it’s guilt when someone’s sad, panic when they’re angry, or discomfort even when they admire you, this episode helps you finally break free. You’ll learn how this core fear is rooted in outdated childhood wiring and how you can begin to rewire your system so you’re no longer held hostage by others’ moods. Through powerful examples and real-life metaphors, Dr. Aziz shows you a way out of emotional over-responsibility and into a life of greater freedom, truth, and inner peace. You’re not here to manage everyone’s feelings. You’re here to live your life.” 🎧 Ready to stop walking on eggshells and reclaim your emotional freedom? Tune in now and learn how to stay centered even when others feel upset.----------------------------------------------------------- Ever feel like you’re walking through life on emotional eggshells? You say yes when you want to say no. You soften your words to avoid upsetting someone. You apologize even when you haven’t done anything wrong. If you relate to that—this message is for you. Because what’s really going on isn’t just conflict avoidance… it’s fear. Specifically, the fear of other people’s feelings. The Hidden Fear Driving Nice People Most “nice” people think their problem is caring too much. But beneath that is a quiet, anxious belief: “If they feel bad, it means I’m bad.” You might not say that out loud, but it runs the show. Someone’s disappointed in you? You feel guilt. Someone’s angry? You feel panic. Someone’s sad? You feel pressure to fix it. It’s as if their emotions automatically become your responsibility. But here’s the truth: you were never meant to manage other people’s feelings. The Unspoken Contract You Never Signed Somewhere along th

In this vulnerable and revealing episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz returns from a life-changing couples workshop with a fresh insight into what really causes social anxiety and people-pleasing and how to heal it from the inside out. Most people try to overcome self-doubt by repeating affirmations, striving harder, or becoming their “ideal” version of themselves. But as Dr. Aziz explains, this fantasy self is actually wrapped around a much deeper wound: a core belief that we’re not enough or not lovable as we are. Drawing from powerful moments during the retreat, he unpacks how insecure attachment leads to chronic feelings of unworthiness and how our attempts to “fix” ourselves only deepen the cycle. You’ll learn how the path to lasting confidence doesn’t come from becoming more, but from reconnecting with your authentic self, one that is already whole and worthy. Using a powerful metaphor of braided ropes, Dr. Aziz helps you see the loop you might be caught in and how to step out of it for good. "Everything is changeable. 100%. It’s not about becoming someone else. It’s about coming home to who you already are." Ready to heal the root of social anxiety and step into real freedom? Tune in now and rediscover your worth.   ---------------------------------------------- Have you ever wondered why you still feel not enough, no matter how much you achieve, improve, or try to please? Why confidence sometimes feels like an act, and connection like a test you can fail? What if the real issue isn’t that you’re broken but that you were never fully bonded? In this episode, I want to take you deeper to the root of social anxiety and people pleasing. Because beneath the awkward moments, the self-doubt, and the endless striving lies something much more fundamental: a missing sense of I’m okay as I am. The Real Source of “I’m Not Enough” At the heart of social anxiety isn’t fear it’s disconnection. When you were young, something subtle but powerful happened: a gap formed between the love and security you needed and what your environment could provide. It wasn’t your fault, and it doesn’t mean your parents didn’t love you. But that gap created what psychologists call insecure attachment a deep, body-level sense of I’m not safe,

In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz offers powerful insight into what to do when you feel like giving up. Whether you're trying to build confidence, face your fears, or push through challenges, there are times when progress feels slow and resistance feels overwhelming. Dr. Aziz unpacks the real reason we feel discouraged and why it’s often not about the actual results we’re getting. You'll discover how unrealistic expectations and unconscious comparisons can drain your motivation and how to shift back into momentum with self-compassion and clarity. Packed with honesty, humor, and actionable tools, this episode is a reminder that you're not broken, you’re just human. And the key to long-term change isn’t forcing yourself forward, but learning how to keep going with heart. 🎧 Feeling stuck? Tune in now and reignite your courage to keep moving forward—no matter what.     -------------------------------------     Ever have one of those days where you just don’t have it in you? You’ve been working on your confidence, trying to speak up, take risks, connect more—but then something happens. You freeze in the meeting. The conversation flops. Someone says “no.” And suddenly that old voice kicks in: “See? You’ll never change.” That voice pulls you down fast. You stop taking action. You retreat. You tell yourself you’re “just busy” or “need a break.” But what’s really happening is something deeper—something every courageous human faces on the path to confidence.   The Doubt Storm Whenever you stretch beyond your comfort zone, you awaken an old gravitational force I call the doubt storm. It’s that heavy pull toward discouragement, self-criticism, and hopelessness. You start circling the drain with thoughts like: “I’m never going to figure this out.” “Something’s wrong with me.” “It always ends this way.” And once that story takes over, it feels impossible to fight. But this is where real confidence begins—not in the easy wins, but in your capacity to weather the storm without giving up. “Confidence isn’t built in your victories. It’s built in the moments you refuse to quit.”   1. Be the Mountain in the Storm The most powerful thing you can d

In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz reveals the secret to boosting confidence while dissolving anxiety and it’s not another breathing exercise or mindset hack. It’s a deeper shift in how you see yourself and how you approach life. Most people try to overcome fear by gritting their teeth and pushing through. But what if you could unlock a bold version of yourself that actually wants the challenge? Dr. Aziz introduces the powerful identity of the Bold Explorer a part of you that thrives on uncertainty, risk, and discovery. Whether you're working to speak up at work, approach someone you're attracted to, or just stop overthinking every social interaction, this episode gives you a new way to show up with strength, courage, and yes, more fun. Ready to activate the version of you that’s fearless, adventurous, and fully alive? Tune in now and start living like the bold explorer you were born to be.     ---------------------------------------------     If you’ve tried all the “calm down” hacks—meditations, breathing apps, mantras—and still find anxiety waiting for you at work, on dates, or before you speak up… this is for you. There’s a faster path than soothing your nerves in the moment: change who’s showing up. When you do, confidence rises and anxiety dissolves—without white-knuckling your way through it. “Confidence isn’t something you earn— it’s something you remember.” The One Shift: Become the Bold Explorer Anxiety spikes when the “stay-safe” part of you takes the wheel. Instead, step into a different identity: the Bold Explorer—the part of you that seeks growth, welcomes the unknown, and chooses meaningful risk over comfortable stagnation. Explorers don’t wait to “feel ready.” They move toward the edge on purpose. Try this: Before a conversation, meeting, or date, pause and say (quietly or aloud), “I’m a Bold Explorer. Let’s see what’s here.” Notice how your posture, breath, and tone shift toward grounded courage. “Boldness is always rewarded: with aliveness, with wisdom—and often with wins.” Why This Kills Anxiety (and Builds Real Confidence) Most people dip a toe outside their comfort zone, endure the fear, then retreat. That trains your body to associate growth with threat. The Explorer flips the scr

In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz issues a bold 7-day challenge that just might transform your confidence: stop apologizing. Not when you bump into someone, but the deeper, more compulsive “I’m sorry” that leaks out when you speak up, have needs, or reveal who you are. If you’ve ever found yourself saying “Sorry to bother you” or “I’m sorry, that was probably too much…”—this episode is for you. Dr. Aziz reveals why chronic apologizing isn't just a bad habit—it's a deep, unconscious signal that says “I’m not allowed to exist as I am.” You’ll learn how these little apologies sap your power, disconnect you from others, and reinforce toxic self-doubt. Packed with stories, humor, and a clear 7-day “apology fast” experiment, this conversation will help you ditch the reflex, reclaim your voice, and show up unapologetically real. Ready to stop shrinking and start owning your space? Tune in now and begin your 7-day confidence reboot.---------------------------------------------- How many times did you apologize today? If you’re like most people, it’s probably more than you realize. “I’m sorry” slips out when we bump into someone, when we speak up, when we share something personal, and when we even exist in a way that might inconvenience someone. But here’s the truth: you’re not being polite—you’re being powerless. For one week, I want to challenge you to stop apologizing unnecessarily. What happens next might shock you. The Addiction You Don’t Realize You Have Over-apologizing feels harmless—like good manners. But in reality, it’s an emotional addiction. Every “I’m sorry” is a tiny attempt to soothe discomfort. You’re trying to make sure no one’s upset, that no one disapproves, that everyone’s okay with you. It’s a self-soothing reflex, just like reaching for sugar or scrolling endlessly on your phone. It gives you a micro-hit of safety… at the cost of your power. The moment you say “sorry” when you’ve done nothing wrong, you send a subconscious message to yourself: “I’m a problem. I shouldn’t exist this way.” And you don’t just say it once—you reinforce it dozens of times a day. The Cost of Compulsive Apologizing At best, this habit makes you seem uncertain. At worst, it dam

In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz shares the Top 3 Keys from the Extremely Confident Conversation Master Training—a powerful 3‑day virtual workshop designed to help you break free from self‑doubt, deepen real connections, and show up fully as yourself. Whether you attended the event or missed it, this episode distills the most transformative takeaways you can apply right now to create more ease, connection, and confidence in every conversation. Discover how to reignite your natural desire for connection, rebuild your innate capacity for authentic conversation, and dissolve the illusion that you don’t belong. Dr. Aziz reveals why connection is not optional—it’s essential—and how to overcome the hidden beliefs and fears that keep your heart closed or your confidence limited. Packed with humor, stories, and actionable insights, this episode invites you to open your heart, take bold social risks, and remember that you already belong. 🎧 Ready to unlock deeper connection and social freedom? Tune in now to Shrink for the Shy Guy and discover the 3 keys that can change how you show up in every conversation.----------------------------------------------- What if connection isn’t something you have to earn… but something you already deserve? Most people spend their whole lives trying to “get better” at talking to others—learning the right things to say, the right tone, and the right body language. But at the root, confidence in connection has nothing to do with perfect lines or tricks. It’s about how open your heart is, how much you trust yourself, and whether you believe you belong. After teaching my Supremely Confident Conversation Master workshop for the seventh time, three powerful lessons stood out that will change how you relate to everyone—from strangers to soulmates. 1. You Have to Want It You can’t create real connection if you’ve convinced yourself you don’t need it. Maybe you’ve been hurt before. Maybe you got rejected, ghosted, or left behind. Somewhere along the line, you told yourself, “I’m fine alone.” But that story isn’t strength—it’s self-protection. Connection is not optional. It’s essential. Just like your body needs water, your soul needs genuine human connection. When you shut that part of yourself dow

In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz reveals the surprising antidote to anxiety—and it’s not a breathing trick, mindset hack, or self-soothing technique. It’s something much deeper, much more powerful... and much more liberating. If you’ve ever struggled with social anxiety, performance anxiety, or general fear about future events—this episode is for you. Dr. Aziz breaks down what actually creates anxiety (hint: it’s not the situation itself) and why so many well-meaning efforts to manage or eliminate anxiety fail. You’ll discover how attachment to specific outcomes fuels fear, and how opening to all outcomes can set you free. Packed with stories, metaphors, and practical insights, this conversation invites you to stop clinging, start choosing, and reclaim your peace and personal power. 🎧 Ready to step into real freedom? Tune in now and learn how to live without fear holding you back.--------------------------------------- Do you get nervous before social events, presentations, or even small conversations? Do your palms sweat, your mind race, or your stomach knot up? What if I told you that anxiety isn’t actually in the event itself—and that realizing this could be the first step to freedom? Many people assume the fear they feel is because the situation is “scary.” Public speaking terrifies them. Approaching someone attractive feels impossible. Even something as simple as paying taxes can trigger tension. And while these experiences feel real, the truth is: anxiety isn’t in the circumstance—it’s in how you relate to it. “Pick any situation—bungee jumping, giving a presentation, meeting someone new. There’s always someone who feels terrified, and someone who feels excited. Anxiety isn’t the event—it’s in the attachment to the outcome.” The Hidden Ingredient of Anxiety So what creates anxiety? One word: attachment. It’s the intense need for things to go a certain way. The desire for approval, for everything to be perfect, for no awkward pauses or mistakes. This attachment fuels your nervous system: muscles tense, your mind spins, and panic can emerge—even before you’ve begun. Think about it. You’re anxious because you want someone to respond positively, or you need the conversation to hit a certain standard, or you fear judgment if you stumble. That clinging, th

In today’s episode, we dive into a powerful truth: becoming more magnetic and attractive doesn’t require abs, money, or status—it starts with how you see yourself. If you’ve ever felt like you’re just not desirable enough, that something is wrong with you, or that others wouldn’t want to be close to the “real you,” this conversation will shift everything. Dr. Aziz shares his personal journey from years of insecurity, social anxiety, and rejection to finding genuine freedom and connection. You’ll discover why your belief that you’re not attractive is the actual block—not your looks, your personality, or your past. The secret? A willingness to let yourself be seen and known. And not just intellectually, but emotionally—fully and courageously. If you want more magnetism, more connection, and more real confidence in every area of life—from friendships to dating to your career—this episode is for you. Tune in now, and take the first step toward living life unhidden.------------------ Most people think being magnetic and attractive is about perfect abs, flawless hair, or saying all the right things. But the truth is, the biggest obstacle to your natural magnetism isn’t your appearance at all—it’s what you believe about yourself. In this post, you’ll discover why your “fantasy self” is quietly sabotaging your confidence and how you can start becoming irresistible right now, without changing who you are. The Biggest Block to Attraction (And It’s Not Your Looks) When I ask clients why they hesitate to approach someone, they’ll grimace and say, “It’s not going to go well.” Underneath that is a story: I’m not magnetic, I’m not attractive, and I’m not desirable. This story creates a trap. We tell ourselves, “I’ll finally put myself out there when I’m thinner, richer, more interesting, or more confident.” That version of you—your “fantasy self”—never gets anxious, always knows what to say, and looks amazing. Until you become that version, you stay hidden. But here’s the cost: life passes you by. You miss out on connection, love, friendships, and opportunities that are available right now. The real obstacle isn’t that people wouldn’t be drawn to you—it’s that you’re telling yourself you’re not attractive enough to try. The Real Secret to Being Magnetic: Willingness to Be Seen and Known Let me give you the great secret right now: attraction begins with a wil

Do you ever say, “I just don’t like talking to people,” or “That’s not my scene,” and leave it at that? In this episode, we dig deeper into that resistance—what’s really behind the stories we tell ourselves about not wanting to socialize. Whether it’s shyness, discomfort, or old fear masked as preference, Dr. Aziz unpacks how these beliefs can limit connection, joy, and opportunity. You'll learn how to move through that inner “I don’t wanna” voice, what it takes to build real social confidence (even if you're more introverted), and how to stop shrinking your world out of fear. If you’re ready to drop the excuses, expand your comfort zone, and experience more freedom in social situations, listen now. And if you want to go further, check out the link below to join the Supremely Confident Conversation Master workshop—happening soon.------------------ "Resistance and fear only have power if you let them control your choices." Do you dread networking events, parties, or casual social interactions? Maybe you tell yourself, “I’m not the kind of person who does this,” or “It’s just not my scene.” Over time, these stories create a version of yourself that avoids connection, missing friendships, opportunities, and growth. The good news: talking with people can be enjoyable—and even energizing—once you understand the patterns holding you back. The Hidden Block: Avoidance and Resistance Most social anxiety isn’t about the people around you—it’s about your internal response. Resistance, aversion, and fear mask themselves as judgments about the environment or other people. You might think, “Everyone’s superficial, it’s going to be boring, I don’t fit in here,” when really your fear of judgment or rejection is driving the story. Here’s the truth: naming your discomfort and recognizing it as natural is liberating. You don’t need to eliminate fear—you need to act despite it. "The truth will set you free, man. When you name your fear, that’s an act of courage." The Cold Plunge Principle: Embrace Discomfort Imagine a cold plunge: it feels awful before you step in, but exhilarating afterward. Social interactions work the same way. The initial hesitation is temporary—your mind says “don’t go,” but when you act, you exper

Most people try to manage their social anxiety — rehearsing what to say, overanalyzing every conversation, and worrying endlessly about what others think. But what if you didn’t have to manage it anymore? In this powerful episode, I share what it takes to eliminate social anxiety at its core. Not just coping strategies — but true liberation. You’ll discover the root cause of social anxiety, how your body unconsciously chooses fear, and how to reroute that pattern toward real confidence and connection. If you've ever wanted to go from anxious and self-conscious to bold and free, this episode is for you. Tune in now to learn how to stop avoiding and start living — and if you’re ready to go further, check the description for a link to my upcoming virtual workshop: Supremely Confident Conversation Master.---------------------- “Social freedom isn’t about never feeling nervous—it’s about never letting fear control your life.” Do you predict rejection before you even approach someone—before sending that email, making a phone call, or asking someone out on a date? Do you feel that inner bracing, that tension preparing for the “no” you fear? If so, you’re not alone—and there’s a way to change it. Understanding the Fork in the Road Imagine you’re hiking in the mountains and come to a fork in the trail. One path is treacherous, winding, and exposes you to danger—never leading to the town you’re trying to reach. The other path is rocky but leads to connection, safety, and community. Social anxiety works the same way: the “wrong” path is the one where fear dictates your actions, keeping you stuck in hesitation, self-doubt, and overthinking every interaction. The critical insight is this: social anxiety isn’t caused by other people. It’s not about their judgment, disapproval, or indifference. It’s about what you do with those perceptions—the fear, shame, and self-criticism that rise in response. Once we see rejection or judgment as dangerous, we retreat, hide, or perform, creating the very symptoms we want to avoid. The Real Problem: Patterns, Not People “Social anxiety is a pattern, not an identity. You can change the pattern and experience a different result.” Predicting rejection creates self-fulfilling prophecies. If you approach every conversation expecting judgment,

If you've ever walked away from a conversation cringing, overanalyzing what you said, or feeling disconnected and uncomfortable… this episode is for you. Dr. Aziz reveals exactly what causes those awkward moments—and how to stop them for good. You’ll learn the different types of “awkward,” why it’s not actually about what you said, and how your inner narratives (not your social skills) are often the real culprit. He’ll also guide you through powerful mindset shifts that melt away social tension and help you show up more relaxed, confident, and authentic. Plus, get a sneak peek into Supremely Confident Conversation Master, Dr. Aziz’s upcoming virtual event where you’ll not only learn tools to master conversations—you’ll practice them live with others. Whether you want to stop overthinking, deepen connections, or finally feel at ease in any interaction, this episode is the first step. 🎧 Tune in now to break free from awkwardness and experience the power of showing up as the real you.-------------------------------------------------- Have you ever left a conversation feeling embarrassed, replaying every word in your head, thinking, “Ugh, that was so awkward”? You’re not alone. Awkward conversations are painful—not just in the moment, but in the aftermath, haunting you long after the words have been said. But what if I told you that “awkward” doesn’t actually exist in the way you think it does? Redefining Awkward: It’s Not What You Think Most people use the word “awkward” as if it’s a tangible thing, like a chair or a water bottle sitting in the room. “It was awkward,” they say. But here’s the truth: awkward isn’t real. What you’re actually feeling is discomfort—anxiety, embarrassment, or self-consciousness. And the other person? They probably didn’t notice a thing. When you start labeling your interactions as awkward, you amplify your inner anxiety. Suddenly, the focus isn’t on connecting—it’s on whether you’re performing correctly, saying the “right” thing, or being judged. That’s when social anxiety takes over, and the moment you could enjoy becomes a moment you dread. Three Ways to End Awkwardness 1. Notice Your Inner Critic Much of what makes a conversation feel awkward comes from inside. That voice tellin

Welcome to this week’s episode, where we dive into one of the biggest emotional traps that keeps people stuck—guilt. Whether it's around setting boundaries, saying no, or just doing what you want, guilt can silently run your life. We’ll break down what actually causes guilt (hint: it’s not just someone else’s reaction), how to spot the invisible strands of the “guilt web,” and what it really means to live free from it. If you've ever felt selfish for protecting your time or space, this episode is going to shift everything. Plus, I’ll share exciting updates about the upcoming Supremely Confident Conversation Master virtual event happening October 10–12, where we’ll not only talk about this stuff—we’ll practice it live. Ready to stop feeling bad for being honest? Listen now and learn how to step out of the guilt trap—once and for all.---------------------------------- Guilt. Oh yes, guilt. It comes up in so many areas of life—relationships, work, social obligations. In fact, it’s one of the biggest obstacles to setting boundaries. Many people get stuck not because they fear conflict, but because they fear guilt—the heavy, internal tug that fires off the moment you consider saying no. But here’s the good news: you can shift this experience and navigate your interactions without getting trapped in the web of guilt. Why I Call It the “Web of Guilt” I call it a web because that’s exactly how it feels—sticky, entangling, and hard to escape. Imagine a spider web with a bug trapped in the middle. Every strand pulls, tugging the bug in multiple directions. Guilt works the same way. There are many invisible strands—often subconscious—that keep us tied to other people’s expectations, imagined or real. But just like some insects are resistant to spiderwebs, you can learn to navigate guilt without getting stuck. It’s tempting to blame the other person. You might think: “I feel guilty because I said no, and they’re upset.” Not quite. Guilt is internal. The other person’s emotions—whether upset, disappointed, or angry—don’t automatically trigger your guilt. Here’s a quick test: imagine a random stranger demands your meal at a restaurant. Most people wouldn’t f

Want to speak up more confidently in meetings—whether it's a one-on-one with your boss or in front of a whole group? If you've ever stayed quiet even when you had something valuable to share, this episode is for you. We’re diving into what holds you back, how to shift the way you see yourself, and powerful tools to start showing up with boldness at work. Plus, I’ll share a special invitation to my only virtual event this year. 🎧 Hit play and let’s help you become more visible, confident, and influential in every conversation.------------------- If you struggle with speaking up in meetings, you’re not alone. Many people I work with are highly skilled, intelligent, and capable—they do great work—but when it comes to the social side of work, they retreat. They recede into the background, becoming the wallflower of the meeting. And it doesn’t matter whether it’s a one-on-one with a supervisor, a small team of two or three colleagues, or a large group of ten or twenty—this pattern shows up everywhere. For many, especially those who have a history of people-pleasing, the anxiety is subtle at first. They freeze, hesitate, or simply stay quiet. Virtual meetings can make it even easier to hide—camera off, muted, and invisible. I’ve had clients tell me that, since working with me, they started turning their cameras on during meetings, and they noticed a profound shift in how present and engaged they felt. Before, avoidance ruled their behavior. Now, with awareness and practice, they’re stepping forward. Avoidance may seem harmless, but it comes at a cost. Professionally, it can limit your growth. I can’t tell you how many people have shared with me that they were passed over for promotions—not because their work was lacking, but because they didn’t speak up. Others who spoke more, shared ideas freely, and took visible action often got ahead, even when their ideas weren’t better. This isn’t fair, but it’s reality. Social visibility matters. It also impacts your confidence and self-esteem. When you retreat, you reinforce the belief that your voice isn’t valuable. You diminish your own engagement and sense of power at work. But here’s the truth: showing up, speaking, and sharing your ideas builds confidence. It strengthens your presence. It reminds you that you have something valuable to contribute. So how do you shift this? Start by recognizing the root of your anxiety. Most often, it comes from a f

If you ever feel anxious when interacting with others—whether you're sharing your thoughts, speaking up, or simply being seen—you're likely running a powerful, hidden pattern. In this episode, we’ll uncover what that pattern is, how it silently runs the show, and how to break free from it. Dr. Aziz shares a transformative insight about the story we tell ourselves—“they don’t like me”—and how this subtle but constant belief fuels anxiety, guilt, and people-pleasing. You’ll learn how to spot when this belief is activated, why it’s totally made up, and what to do to shift into a more confident, grounded state. Get ready to break free from the fear of being disliked, stop bracing for rejection, and start showing up with more authenticity and peace. Listen now and learn how to stop assuming you're being judged—and start being yourself.--------------------------------------   The pattern we’re talking about is imagining. It’s that inner feeling and the mental story that comes with it, usually subconscious, that creates anxiety in social, professional, or creative situations. You might not consciously think, “They’re going to hate me,” but your body, your nervous system, and your emotions respond as if it’s real. You feel discomfort, tension, and even dread because you’re imagining people being upset, disappointed, or disgusted with you. This pattern is incredibly common and is the root of chronic guilt, social anxiety, and discomfort around putting yourself out there. The critical thing to understand is that this anxiety is self-generated. Those images of people rejecting you, being disappointed, or hating you are largely hallucinations created by your own mind. Recognizing that you are generating this story is the first step toward liberation. Once you see it, you can start breaking the hold it has over you. There’s a part of you that Dr. Aziz calls the “safety police.” This part hates uncertainty and discomfort, so it predicts the worst-case scenario for everyone at all times. It’s trying to protect you from pain, like the rare instance of someone disliking you, by keeping you socially guarded all the time. The problem is that it overprotects. It creates the illusion that everyone might be judging or hating you, which makes life feel heavy, limiting, and anxious. You cannot control other people’s opinions, but you can cultivate internal certainty.

Welcome to today’s powerful episode of the show — where we expose one of the most common, invisible lies holding you back from confidence, boldness, and a fully alive life. What’s the lie? Just five words: “I can’t because I’m scared.” It sounds reasonable — even factual. But what if that story is not only false… it’s also the very thing keeping you stuck? Dr. Aziz dives deep into how this belief quietly controls your behavior, limits your growth, and keeps you from taking even small steps toward what you want — whether in social situations, your career, or your relationships. You’ll discover why fear and ability are not causally linked, and how separating discomfort from impossibility is the first step to reclaiming your freedom. This isn’t about pushing you into the deep end — it’s about compassionate, consistent progress. With the right tools, mindset, and willingness to be temporarily uncomfortable, you can create extraordinary transformation. 🔥 If you're ready to challenge your limits and step into more boldness, this episode is for you. Tune in now and take the brakes off your confidence.-------------------------------- How often do you find yourself saying “yes” when you really want to say “no”? Or perhaps you quietly suppress your own needs, thinking that if you just accommodate others, everything will be fine. If you've ever struggled with this, you're not alone. In this post, we'll explore why it's so difficult to ask for what you want in your relationships and how embracing your true needs can transform your life—socially, professionally, and personally. Why Do We Struggle with Asking for What We Want? We all have wants and needs, but somehow, the act of asking for them can feel overwhelming. Maybe you're afraid of being seen as "too needy," or you worry about pushing others away. This fear often stems from a deep-seated belief that we’re not enough as we are—that our desires aren't worth voicing or that others will reject us if we express them. Take it from my own experience. In my 20s, I struggled with boundaries in romantic relationships. While I could confidently approach women and start dating, once the relationship progressed, I found myself wanting to pull away. I couldn’t figure out why, until I realized that I had a hard time navigating the balance of wanting something and expressing that need openly. In fact, the i

Today’s episode is all about you—what you want and need in your life and in your relationships. Whether it’s with a romantic partner, a friend, a coworker, or a family member, you are constantly navigating wants, needs, and boundaries. But how do you even know what you want—let alone ask for it without guilt, fear, or discomfort? That’s exactly what we’re going to explore together. If you've ever struggled with people-pleasing, over-accommodating, or avoiding conflict, this episode will be deeply liberating. Dr. Aziz shares personal stories—from relationship challenges to parenting decisions—to reveal how easy it is to lose ourselves in the name of being “nice.” He breaks down the roots of this pattern and teaches you how to reconnect with your desires, give yourself permission to express them, and advocate for what truly matters to you. You’ll also learn the MVP question that changes everything: What do I want? When you start asking this regularly, your confidence, clarity, and sense of freedom will grow. This episode is your invitation to step out of niceness and into a more powerful, authentic version of you.---------------------------------------------------------------------------   Have you ever found yourself bending over backwards in relationships, doing everything for others, and yet feeling like you're not getting what you need? Whether it's with a romantic partner, a friend, or even at work, the challenge of asking for what you want is something we all face. But here's the truth: without skillfully advocating for yourself, you’ll continue to miss out on the connection, respect, and fulfillment you deserve. In this blog post, we’re going to dive into how to understand what you truly want in relationships, why it’s often so hard to ask for it, and how to start changing that dynamic today. What Do You Really Want? In every relationship, there are things you want and things you need. This could be in a romantic relationship, with your family, or in your work life. We all have desires—things we want to feel seen, heard, and valued. But often, due to fear of being “too demanding” or not wanting to burden others, we suppress those needs. So, how do you know the difference between a need and a want? The key is understanding that your desires are just as valid as anyone else’s, and it's okay t

Do you feel stuck trying to be "nice" all the time? Always avoiding conflict, worrying what others will think, and saying yes when you mean no? In this episode, Dr. Aziz reveals the hidden cost of people-pleasing—and why it’s one of the most dangerous habits you can have. From parenting to relationships to work decisions, this pattern can quietly lead you into situations that drain your time, money, confidence, and joy. With humor and real-life examples, Dr. Aziz shows how the gentle current of niceness can pull you far off course. You’ll hear stories from his own life—including a recent run-in with a pushy salesman—that bring this dynamic to life in vivid detail. Most importantly, he helps you recognize where this pattern shows up in your world so you can start making new, empowered choices. If you’re ready to stop being the “good boy” or “good girl” and start being you—bold, real, and powerful—this episode is your invitation. Listen now and take the first step toward more confidence, freedom, and self-respect.---------------------------------------------   Welcome to another episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, where we tackle the challenges of social anxiety, people-pleasing, and self-doubt to help you confidently show up as your true self. Today’s episode is about breaking free from the crippling grip of anxiety—specifically, how the need to control your environment can intensify your feelings of anxiety and hold you back. Why Do We Feel Anxious? Anxiety is an uncomfortable and unsettling feeling, often accompanied by thoughts of worry or fear. It's that nagging voice in your head telling you that something bad is going to happen, causing your body to feel on edge, frantic, or even panicked. Anxiety can show up anywhere—whether it’s in social situations, at work, or in personal relationships. But what if I told you that the key to reducing anxiety isn’t about finding a quick fix or a silver bullet, but about changing how you relate to the anxiety itself? The Need for Control: The Root Cause of Anxiety Here’s the truth: Anxiety often stems from the need to control. When we feel like we need something to happen a certain way—whether it’s for people to like us, to be successful, or to avoid discomfort—we trigger anxiety. We think, "If I don’t control this, something bad will happen."

Are you caught in the gentle current of people-pleasing? In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz breaks down the hidden dangers of being “too nice”—how it shows up in everyday decisions, subtly steers your life off course, and costs you more than you realize. With real-life stories (including a surprising run-in with a John Deere salesman), Dr. Aziz shows how saying “yes” when you mean “no” drains your power—and how to reclaim it. 🎧 Listen now to stop living for others’ approval and start living as the real you.  ---------------------------------------------------------- Do you feel like you're stuck in a cycle of social anxiety and avoidance? You're not alone. Many people struggle with this exact pattern, and if you're ready to break free from it, you're in the right place. In today’s blog post, we’re diving into the Avoidance Cycle—why it keeps you stuck, how it plays out in your life, and most importantly, how you can break free and build lasting confidence. Let’s uncover the truth behind this cycle and discover how you can shift from avoidance to confidence. What is the Avoidance Cycle? The avoidance cycle begins when you face discomfort. Whether it’s approaching someone you’re attracted to, speaking up in a meeting, or sending that important email you’ve been putting off, discomfort creeps in. It could be mild anxiety, fear of rejection, or dread of confrontation. In response, the brain seeks relief and takes the easy route: avoidance. But here’s the kicker—avoiding the discomfort reinforces the cycle. Instead of growing through it, you take the easier, more comfortable path, but that path leads to stagnation. Over time, the avoidance habit gets stronger, not just in big situations, but in smaller moments too. You start avoiding more and more, even when the discomfort is mild. Stand-out Quote: “Confidence cannot be built while we’re in the avoidance cycle. The key is breaking the pattern of avoidance and facing discomfort head-on.” Why Avoidance Holds You Back Avoidance seems harmless, right? After all, who doesn’t want to avoid the discomfort of awkward situations? But here’s the problem: The more you avoid, the weaker you become in dealing with discomfort. Just like if you avoid physical exercise, your body becomes weaker

Are you caught in the gentle current of people-pleasing? In this episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, Dr. Aziz breaks down the hidden dangers of being “too nice”—how it shows up in everyday decisions, subtly steers your life off course, and costs you more than you realize. With real-life stories (including a surprising run-in with a John Deere salesman), Dr. Aziz shows how saying “yes” when you mean “no” drains your power—and how to reclaim it. 🎧 Listen now to stop living for others’ approval and start living as the real you. ------------------------------------------------------- People-pleasing—sounds harmless, right? After all, isn't it just about being a nice person, accommodating others, and making sure no one gets upset? But here's the reality: people-pleasing is a dangerous game that subtly chips away at your confidence and can lead to big, negative consequences over time. Whether it's in your personal relationships, your career, or even your finances, playing nice can backfire, leaving you feeling unfulfilled and disconnected. In today’s episode, I’m going to break down the hidden dangers of people-pleasing and share powerful insights on how to start stepping into your authentic self, without the need to please others at the expense of your own well-being. If you’ve ever found yourself overcommitting or avoiding necessary conflicts just to keep others happy, this episode is for you. The Cost of People-Pleasing We all know that one person—maybe it’s you—who just can’t say no. Whether it’s lending money to friends and family, accommodating people’s demands at work, or giving up your personal time to make someone else happy, these behaviors seem harmless at first but can lead to resentment, burnout, and feeling like you’re not truly living for yourself. A big part of this people-pleasing pattern is avoiding conflict. The idea is to keep everyone happy, even if it means sacrificing your own needs. But this constant accommodation keeps you from making decisions that are right for you. Over time, this gives rise to feelings of frustration, unfulfillment, and even emotional exhaustion. The Hidden Signs of Low Confidence People-pleasing doesn’t just affect how you feel about yourself—it also impacts how others see you. One of the firs