Episode Summary

Do you ever find yourself pulled between what you want and what others want for you? Are you too afraid to be your true self or share your real thoughts? Do you care too much about what other people think? 🤔 Let’s talk about learning to live for yourself & not others. 🤗 From childhood, a lot of us begin our lives learning to live for our parent's approval and the approval of those around us—our peers, teachers, or society in general. This comes out of our desire for love and a sense of belonging. We seek love and acceptance from others, which is understandable, as one of Maslow’s psychological needs. Eventually though, we must learn to love ourselves, and find within us the love, approval, validation and confidence we've been yearning for. Thus begins the journey of discovering internal validation over external validation. 😊 Living for yourself means living the life that YOU want for yourself, regardless of the opinions of others. It’s living a life you feel aligned with, a life you love, and a life you are proud of. 😎 Living for others means living to please others, living for external validation & approval, and caring about what others think. You’re setting your goals based on what others want for you (like your parents), or chasing what society deems as success. Living for others can also mean wanting to do things to impress others, please others, or get approval from others, so you're not really being your authentic self and doing what you want. You're doing things because you care about how you appear to others. 😔 Let’s first clarify that “living for yourself and not others” doesn’t mean you should live a selfish life without considering or helping other people. It means learning to put your own needs first, and making choices that align with your values; doing things because you want to, and not because other people are influencing you to. If you want to help others, and it’s coming from an authentic place, then great. But don’t do it just because you feel obligated or pressured to. 🙅‍♀️ Understand that your life is in your hands, and if you give away that power to anyone else, you’re taking away from your own. 🧏‍♀️ Listen to Episode 45 to discover some interesting steps to begin living for yourself. 😍
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