The Art of Charm
AJ Harbinger and Johnny Dzubak and Kast Media

The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.

Adversity has shaped humanity into who we are now - the most dominant and inventive species on this planet - so what can you do to stop looking at adversity as a roadblock and start looking at it as a necessity to becoming who you want to become? What to Listen ForHow can you know when you should trust your gut and when you should trust logic?What can you do to develop your own sense of intuition?Why is embarrassment integral to learning and mastery of a skill?What are the biggest social skills deficits in the workplace today and what should you focus on if you don’t want to lose out on that next job or promotion?What areas of your life should you focus on if hard work is not enough to get ahead in today’s world?How do you make your own privilege and create advantages for yourself in life that no one can take away from you?Why is it so important to think about the intent of a message vs the impact?What can you do to build advantages against biases people might have toward you? What is Laura Huang’s EDGE acronym stand for and how can you use it to gain an edge over your competition?How do you ask questions at a new job without coming across as incompetent? If we lived in a world without adversity, what challenges would you face to make you a better person mentally, emotionally, and physically? Many of us wish our lives were easy (or easier) but might not realize how important it is to our development that we are challenged on a regular basis. Unless you experience disappointment, how can you learn to set expectations? Unless you lose someone you care about, how can you learn how to cope with loss?  Every time you are faced with adversity, it is an opportunity to learn something about yourself and life. You are the product of billions of years of life facing adversity and adapting to deal with it - there’s no reason it has to stop now that you’re stressed out about a job promotion or exam. Face your challenges head-on, use them to your advantage, and learn from them. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Edge: Turning Adversity into Advantage by Laura Huang Laura Huang’s website Laura Huang on LinkedIn Laura Huang on Instagram Laura Huang on Facebook Laura Huang on YouTube Laura Huang on Twitter Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

The tendency to self-sabotage is a part of who we are as humans, but many of us don’t even know when we’re doing it - so what can you do to identify the areas in your life when you tend to self-sabotage and what steps can you take to prevent self-sabotage in the future? What to Listen ForWhat is self-sabotage and why do we all do it in some form or another?How do we self-diagnose our own self-sabotage and what can we do to stop it so it doesn’t damage our relationships or professional career?Are New Years Resolutions the best way to making changes in our lives, and what should we do if they’re not?What is the biggest misconception surrounding self-sabotage?How do we strengthen our willpower so that in times of potential self-sabotage we don’t fail?What is the L.I.F.E. acronym and how can you use it to identify the areas in your life where you are prone to self-sabotage?How does social media affect our tendency to self-sabotage and what can you do to prevent it?Once you identify the triggers that cause you to self-sabotage, what can you do to change them?What is the difference between diffusing a thought and fusing with one, and why should you try to always avoid one of the two?How do lofty goals lead people to self-sabotage and how should you approach goal setting in a way that doesn’t lead you to feel like a failure when you don’t achieve your goals?What can you do to define your values so you can live a fulfilled life?When you have identified changes you want to make in your life, how do you develop a blueprint for change that you can use to structure and plan the journey to becoming a better version of yourself?How do you avoid self-sabotage in romantic relationships?How much time should you spend on self-development? Self-sabotage is a tendency we have as humans to create problems for ourselves that get in the way of what we want from life. This tendency can be triggered when we find ourselves in a place of uncertainty or fear, so a great place to start in identifying your own self-sabotaging behaviors is to stop and think the next time you find yourself unsure of what to do next or how to solve an issue in your life. Rather than acting instinctively, take some time and think about how you would normally act in that situation and whether that gets you closer to your goals or pushes you away. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Stop Self-Sabotage by Dr. Judy Ho Dr. Judy Ho on Twitter Episode 729: Self-esteem is Bullshit with Dr. Steven Hayes Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Talking to people we don’t know can be uncomfortable and sometimes terrifying, so why is it so important that we become comfortable with it and overcome the fear, what does science say about the value of talking to strangers, and what can you do to become a master of meeting new people? What to Listen ForWhy is it easier for introverts to talk to strangers than friends and family members?Why is it scary for us to talk to people we don’t know and what can you do to overcome that fear?What is a digital device security blanket and how does it put a wall up around each of us?What does science say about the value of small talk with strangers and how can it prevent you from feeling isolated and disconnected from the world around you?Where is the best place to meet new people and what should you say when you introduce yourself?How do you use shared experiences to strike up a conversation with someone you know nothing about?When is it appropriate to compliment a stranger and how do you decide what to compliment someone on?What is a transactional question and how do you ask one without shutting down the conversation before it’s even begun?Can you ask too many questions in a conversation? The more comfortable you are with talking to strangers, the greater your opportunities become. It’s a simple numbers game. If 1 out of every 100 people could connect you to a great job offer, a new friend, or a romantic partner, then doesn’t it stand that the more people you meet, the greater your chances become of landing your dream job, making new friends, and finding a great partner? If you are uncomfortable with striking up a conversation with someone out of the blue, your connections and relationships will always be limited to the people already in your social circle and chance encounters (with people who do like striking up conversations with strangers). You only get one life - don’t leave your fate up to chance. Take control and go after what you want.  A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Resources from this Episode Episode 719: Why Emotional Connection Makes or Breaks a Relationship Art of Charm Bootcamp Art of Charm Network Is Efficiency Overrated? By Gillian M. Sandstrom & Elizabeth W. Dunn The stare as a stimulus to flight in human subjects: A series of field experiments Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Finding your voice as a creative can be difficult and frustrating, so how do you stay true to yourself while pushing the boundaries of your work, what can you do to balance the quantity of output versus the quality, and how do you get buy-in on your creative vision when you’re just starting out? What to Listen ForWho does Matt Komo draw inspiration from and how did he get started in film?What can you do to develop your confidence as a creative when it feels like you’re surrounded by people making better content than you?How do you balance quality vs quantity as a content creator?How do you find the balance between your creative side and the business sideWhat can you do get buy-in on your creative vision and get the necessary support to follow through to completion?How much of telling a story falls on the medium itself and how do you change the way you tell a story from one medium to the next?What can you do to handle the creative differences that inevitably arise between you and a client?How do you open yourself up to larger possibilities if you have no frame of reference for what is possible?How do you self-assess the difference between arrogance and confidence? As a creative, it can be easy to get bogged down by comparing your work to that of other people, especially in today’s world where a simple search can result in countless examples to top-notch work. Fortunately, only you have your perspective on life and your story to tell, so your truth and your voice are unique to you. It will take time and hard work to find your voice, but once you do, no one can take it away from you. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Matt Komo’s YouTube Channel Matt Komo on Twitter Matt Komo on Instagram Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Twitter The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Sales is a part of everyday life, whether you are selling the idea of a promotion to your boss or selling the idea of a date to the person you’re attracted to, but why do many of us associate sales with being sleazy, what can you do to come across as an authentic salesperson with integrity, and what are the seven rules of persuasion and sales? What to Listen ForWhy do so many people get turned off or grossed out by sales and salespeople?What parts of life DON’T involve some form of salesmanship and persuasion?If sales is a part of life whether we like it or not, what can you do to improve your sales and persuasion skills?What is the difference between manipulation and persuasion and why does it make all the difference in the world when it comes to being a great salesperson?How do you maintain your integrity in sales when you’re constantly being pressured by your boss to get that next sale?What can you do to be influential without being manipulative?How can you look at a sale as a moral obligation you have to the person you are selling to?What are Stephen Lowisz’s seven rules of persuasion and sales?What shows true authenticity as a salesperson and how can that authenticity save your integrity and the integrity of the company you work for?Why is it crucial to communicate a vision to who you are selling to?What can you to require action of a prospect in order to move the sales process closer to a close? Sales can and should be fun if you believe in what you are selling, whether you are selling a date night to your significant other, an adventurous vacation to your friends, or a business solution to a client.  If you are able to provide value and/or fix a problem someone has then you can argue you have a moral obligation to sell your idea to the other person, and having that moral obligation can provide you with the determination and enthusiasm to hear the other party out and explain to them exactly how you are going to help them.  A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode The Sales Code by Stephen Lowisz Stephen Lowisz on Twitter Stephen Lowisz’s website Art of Charm Bootcamp Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

You are pitching anytime you attempt to convey an idea, and pitching effectively in today’s world of short attention spans is getting harder and harder, so what can you do to break every pitch down into 3 minutes, improve your own pitching skills, and make sure that next pitch doesn’t cost you a job, an idea, or a relationship? What to Listen ForWhat can we do to practice our pitching skills?When are we NOT pitching our ideas or ourselves?How do you stand out in a sea of dozens or hundreds of other pitches?What are the two forms of information being conveyed in a pitch and what can you do to balance them so one doesn’t overpower the other and ruin your pitch?Why are the first 3 minutes of a pitch the most important and how do you make them count so you don’t waste your time?What does it mean to have an inform and lead approach to your pitch and why is it so important in today’s world of hyper-sensitive consumers?What are statements of value and how can using them change your career forever?What is the WHAC acronym, how does it relate to the statements of value, and how does it bring everything together to help you build the ultimate 3-minute pitch?How should you approach follow up after you’ve made a pitch and what should you avoid doing at all cost?What is the telephone challenge and how can you use it to understand what parts of your pitch are the most valuable and least valuable? You are pitching anytime you are trying to get other people to believe an idea you have. It doesn’t matter if those people are your coworkers, friends, potential customers, or a board of directors - you are pitching, and to be great at pitching requires a different approach now than it did in the past. The era of smooth talking salesmen making grandiose claims and trying to reel you in is over. Our attention spans are shrinking and we have become desensitized to ideas that sound too good to be true. It’s time for the facts. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Episode 790 How To Resolve Conflict Like A Martial Artist with Judy Ringer Brant Pinvidic’s website The 3-Minute Rule by Brant Pinvidic Brant Pinvidic on Twitter Brant Pinvidic on Instagram Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Conflict resolution is not a skillset that comes naturally for most of us because our egos will always want to defend us by proving we’re correct at the expense of actually working to a resolution, so what can we do to understand the psychology of conflict resolution and improve our conflict resolution skills? What to Listen ForWhat core psychological principles cause unnecessary conflict and what can you do to deal with them?What are the different phases of conflict resolution?What can you do to develop the skills required for effective conflict resolution and how can they save you from sabotaging your jobs, friends, or relationship?How did Judy Ringer get her start in conflict resolution?During conflict, why do we default to wanting to be right instead of being curious about the other side, and what can we do to flip that switch so we can deal with conflict more effectively?How can using open questions instead of statements or closed questions lead to an environment better suited for conflict resolution?What does it mean to take responsibility for a conflict even if you’re not actually at fault for what happened?How do you reflect on recent conflicts in order to learn from them and develop your conflict resolution skills?What can you do to journal your conflict resolution journey in a way that helps you grow?What simple tips can you implement to start redirecting conflict toward resolution rather than escalation?As a manager, how do you ask the right questions when trying to resolve a conflict between your employees?What markers can you look for to detect conflict under the surface that might not be apparent at first glance so you know when to step in and stop a spark from growing into a wildfire? Conflict resolution is a skill most of us have to work on intentionally and consistently because our default as humans is to “resolve” conflicts by proving we’re right rather than trying to understand both sides and come to an actual resolution cooperatively. The best place to start is by recognizing the moment a conflict arises and making the decision to ask questions instead of proving you’re right. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Vistaprint wants you to be able to “Own the Now” in any situation, which is why our listeners will get 500 high-quality, custom business cards starting at $9.99. Use discount code CHARM at Vistaprint.com. This Fall, start a new monthly routine that’ll upgrade your life and style with a Box of Awesome from Bespoke Post. Bespoke Post sends guys only the best stuff, every month. So whether you’re looking to craft your own hard-cider or toast perfectly aged Fall cocktails—Box of Awesome has you covered. Get 20% off your first monthly box when you sign up at BoxOfAwesome.com and enter the special discount code AOC at checkout. That’s Box of Awesome dot com, special discount code AOC for 20% off your first box. Resources from this Episode Episode 697 - High Value Conflict Resolution Judy Ringer Turn Enemies Into Allies: The Art of Peace in the Workplace Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Leadership skills is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot yet can mean many different things depending on the person using it, so what does “leadership skills” really mean, what does the science say about the value of leadership skills, and what can you do. What to Listen ForWhat traits do you need to bring to the table as a leader and what can you do to develop them?Why is a strong frame necessary for effective leadership?What does it mean to have a strong frame and what can you do to build one?What tools and techniques can you start using today to be a more effective leader?How do you build leadership skills?Are leadership skills applicable outside of the workplace?What is the CAKE equation and how can you use it to build confidence?What does science say about the value of leadership skills?What are the two leadership styles and which one do we tend to associate with leadership even though it’s not as effective as the other in the long run?How do you work on or start building your leadership skills in your personal life? It might come as a surprise to some that leadership skills are just as important in your personal life as they are in your professional life because being a leader doesn’t automatically imply ordering people around. That is a specific aspect of leadership and one that great leaders rarely resort to. Being a leader within your social circle can just mean taking the initiative in organizing the next poker night or girls’ night out instead of waiting for someone else to do it. Being a leader can also mean encouraging and supporting your friends in hard times and celebrating them in their successes. Leadership means having the confidence in yourself to raise up those around you without expecting anything in return. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Need a stylish, lightweight, and durable suitcase with a 100-day money-back guarantee? Away creates thoughtful products designed to change how you see the world. For $20 off a suitcase, visit awaytravel.com and use discount promo code CHARM20 during checkout! Vistaprint wants you to be able to “Own the Now” in any situation, which is why our listeners will get 500 high-quality, custom business cards starting at $9.99. Use discount code CHARM at Vistaprint.com. Resources from this Episode Frame Analysis: An Essay on the Organization of Experience Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Storytelling might seem like a skill reserved for dinner parties and family gatherings, but we actually use it in our everyday lives, many times without really knowing it - so what can you do to be more aware of when you’re using it, when you should be using it, and how not using it could be leading you to miss out on crucial opportunities for professional and personal growth? What to Listen ForHow did Laura Beil get her start in podcasting?What level of skepticism around the modern healthcare system is appropriate in today’s day and age where you can find countless horror stories throughout the internet?How can you guide people you’re interviewing to tell better stories in response to your questions?What kinds of questions can you ask someone if you want more in-depth answers or explanations?How can you improve your empathy in situations where you’re listening to someone talk about a tragic event in their life?What can you do to bring fresh energy into meetings with your storytelling skills?How do you keep a conversation interesting and lively for hours with someone you have little to nothing in common with? We use storytelling abilities in our everyday lives because we are either asking other people about themselves or vice versa. A good storyteller knows how to answer questions in a way that intrigues people and keeps them engaged in a conversation as well as ask people the right questions that get them to open up and feel comfortable talking about themselves, both of which deepen the connection between them. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Vistaprint wants you to be able to “Own the Now” in any situation, which is why our listeners will get 500 high-quality, custom business cards starting at $9.99. Use discount code CHARM at Vistaprint.com. Resources from this Episode Laura Beil’s website Dr. Death - podcast by Laura Beil Bad Batch - podcast by Laura Beil Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Many of life’s most powerful lessons come from stories of men and women living through dark and ugly periods in history - but why do we relate to these stories so strongly, what’s the best way to tell a story from your own life about adversity or a struggle you endured, and how do you know when such a story is ready to be told? What to Listen ForWhat story from history first hooked Daniele Bolleli into pursuing history?How do you remove the bias or spin from news stories in today’s digital era?What made Daniele Bolelli realize he wanted to start podcasting?How do you tell a story in a way that people actually care about the characters involved?How do you find or build in a hook when you’re trying to figure out the best way to tell a story?How do you balance the dark side of a story with the lighthearted side so neither one pushes the audience away?What can you do to add humor to dark stories in a way that doesn’t feel forced or out of place?What can you look for in a story you want to tell if you want to know if it’s ready to be told?How has Daniele Bolelli’s experience in podcasting influenced his own personal storytelling? Stories from history provide us with archetypes and allow us a glimpse into the human spirit to see what we’re capable of when faced with insurmountable odds or overwhelming tragedy. And one of the most valuable lessons we can take away from all of the stories from history is that everyone involved was human. This is important to remember because we as humans have a habit of disconnecting from people who have accomplished great things and committed great atrocities. When we’re able to identify with the person on a basic level we can be inspired to act as well as develop empathy for those whose lives lead them down dark paths. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Resources from this Episode Daniele Bolelli’s website Daniele Bolelli on Twitter History on Fire Podcast - most recent episodes available on Luminary Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Humans are storytellers by nature, so the ability to tell a great story is something we can all learn and develop over time - but where do you start if you want to become a great storyteller, what is the structure of a great story, and how do you practice if you’re not already a public speaker? What to Listen ForWhat does science tell us about why storytelling is so powerful?What can you do to be a more compelling storyteller?What steps can you follow to tell unforgettable stories?What are the 4 basic steps of storytelling and how can you apply them in everyday life to become a great storyteller?What simple game can you play with family, friends, or strangers to test and improve your storytelling ability?Why are emotions such a crucial aspect of great storytelling and what can you do to incorporate them into your stories?What is the Angel’s Cocktail and how does it make for an unforgettable story?How should you approach storytelling in a professional setting like a networking event versus a personal setting like hanging out with friends or being on a date?How do you tell an engaging story when Powerpoint is involved and what should you avoid doing at all costs?What are the key things you should pay attention to in the audience when presenting?What are the 5 layers of communication and how does knowledge of them tell you who is trustworthy and who is not?What mindset should you adopt to better handle the Q & A after a talk or presentation? Storytelling is a skill like any other, but that means to become great at it requires you to practice it - how can you become good at anything without adequate repetition? But unlike many other skills, storytelling is something you can practice every single day with anyone you talk to. Just think about something that has happened in your life, large or small, and tell the story of it through the 4 basic steps discussed in this episode. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode How to Avoid Death by Powerpoint - TEDx Talk The Magical Science of Storytelling - TEDx Talk The 110 Techniques of Communication and Public Speaking - TEDx Talk JPUniversity - David JP Phillips’s school for storytelling David JP Phillips Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Storytelling is the glue which has held humanity together over tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of years - but why are stories so important to us, what goes into creating a great story, and what can you do turn any story from your life into a great story worth telling? What to Listen ForWhy is storytelling such a valuable skill to have in personal and professional relationships?What can you do to tell engaging and compelling stories?Why is your storytelling ability important for making new friends, building a network, and dating?How does your storytelling ability make or break your performance in sales?Why do many of us focus on the wrong things when telling a story and how is it hindering you socially and professionally?Why are stories so powerful in conveying information and connecting us?How do you structure a story so you’re captivating the listeners and they can’t help but remember you?What is the Hero’s Journey and how has it been used throughout history to structure famous stories in mythology, religion, and literature?What are 8 steps can you follow to turn any story into a great story?How do you turn an average story into a great story?What are the do’s and don’ts of storytelling?What do people connect with most in stories and what puts them off?What is the “curse of knowledge” and how does it hurt your ability to tell great stories? Humans have likely been telling stories since we first stepped foot on this earth. It is one of our defining features in the animal kingdom and it is the thing that enables us to live and work together in groups, from families to communities to companies to nations.  Storytelling is indeed an art, but an art with a structure. This structure has been passed down through the ages and can be found throughout the world in various cultures, which means it can be taught and learned. If you want to create strong relationships in your personal life and professional life, then you need to become a great storyteller. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of classes for creators, entrepreneurs, and curious people everywhere. You can take classes in Film and Video, Marketing, Productivity, and even Entrepreneurship! Join the millions of students already learning on Skillshare today with a special offer just for our listeners: Get two months of Skillshare for free by going to Skillshare.com/CHARM. Equal Parts is here to help you get into the flow of home cooking, with inviting cookware and coaching designed to introduce new ideas and keep you engaged with the process of cooking, one step at a time. Get into the rhythm of the kitchen, with friendly and inviting cookware, coaching, and guidance from Equal Parts. All with free shipping and free returns. Visit equalparts.com and use discount code CHARM get $50 off any cookware kit over $200! Resources from this Episode The Art of Charm Bootcamp Cooperation and the Evolution of Hunter-Gatherer Storytelling Joseph Campbell’s Hero’s Journey Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Networking can seem like a daunting task for introverts, so what strengths do introverts bring to the table that extroverts do not, what value can you bring to a network if you are just starting out, and how can you utilize today’s technology to amplify your networking ability?   What to Listen ForHow can you stand out as an introvert when networking?What is one of the most effective ways to build a network in a fluid job market like Silicon Valley where almost no one stays at one company for more than a couple years?Can you be a master networker if you’re an introvert?What value can you bring to a network when you are just starting out in a new field or career?What strengths do introverts bring to networking that extroverts do not?What can you do to improve your listening skills to make you a better networker?What tools in today’s day and age should you be using to grow and maintain your network?Is email dead?What is the “loose touch” habit and how can you use it to grow and strengthen your network?What is a “third place” and why is it important for you to find yours?How do you balance creating an online brand with oversharing and putting you in a position where companies don’t want to hire you?Why is LinkedIn so pivotal to the world of networking?What questions can you ask yourself when it comes to how you present yourself on social media?How do you set networking goals before attending a conference?What questions should you be asking when meeting new people at a conference or networking event?What do you need to stop doing now when it comes to networking and keeping in touch?What should you be doing when building or growing your network online?What is the “double opt-in” and how can you use it to grow and strengthen your network?What’s the best way to reinitiate contact with people in your network you haven’t talked to in a while? Networking doesn’t have to be hard if you’re an introvert. Many people tend to think about networking and imagine being at a crowded bar or massive conference, making small talk with dozens of people and amassing business cards, phone numbers, and emails. But it doesn’t have to be that at all. Simply focus on the people you enjoy working with and share good memories with, and try to have good interactions with them. Go out for coffee every now and then, schedule a lunch, or stay in touch via email. The key is consistency. Stay in people’s lives and make an effort to connect. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Resources from this Episode Karen Wickre Taking the Work Out of Networking by Karen Wickre Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

In today’s episode, we cover networking and relationship building with Brian Dixon.

The best networkers prepare for networking events in order to get the most out of them, but how do you go about preparing for a networking event, what are the do’s and don’ts of networking, and is your first impression shooting you in the foot before you even open your mouth? What to Listen ForWhat are the do’s and don’ts of networking?How do you handle a networking event if you’re an introvert?What can you do to prepare for a networking event, and do you even need to?How can a bad (or even a neutral) first impression ruin your chances of success at a networking event and what can you do to make a fantastic first impression instead?What kind of research should you do before a networking event?How do you set yourself up for success before and/or during a networking event?How do you choose what to wear for a networking event, and what should you avoid wearing?Where should you hang out at networking events if you want to have the best chance of talking to the individuals you’re trying to meet?Why is it a mistake to make a pitch or try to close a deal when you meet someone at a networking event?What game can you play to make networking opportunities fun and productive?Why is it hurting you to think about what you can take from networking opportunities rather than what you can give?What should you do after a networking event to help you process and learn from the experience?Why is it damaging to your networking potential if you can’t explain what you do in simple terms?What should your elevator pitch attempt to accomplish and why do so many of us focus on the wrong parts?Why do most people fail when it comes to networking and what can you do to set yourself apart from them?How soon after meeting someone at a networking event should you start working on the follow-up?What is a pre-event and how can you plan a simple one to your advantage, setting you apart from most people at a networking event? Networking is like many endeavors in this world - your results depend on how much work you’re willing to put in. The best networkers prepare for every networking event by making sure their first impression is on point, they know who is going to attend and who they want to meet, they understand how to connect and pitch themselves, and most importantly, they follow up. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Resources from this Episode Episode 693: Identifying Low Value Behaviors Episode 694: Becoming High Value Episode 781: How To Grow Your Network Through Social Capital Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Introduction Networking has picked up a bad rap over the years, but what exactly is networking, how is your network different from your social circle, and how do you go about building a strong network full of great people and amazing opportunities? What to Listen ForWhat is the difference between your social circle and your network, and how can the misunderstanding of the difference lead to a loss of opportunities, both personally and professionally?What are the biggest myths surrounding networking?What is social capital and why is your familiarity with it crucial to your ability to network effectively?Why do many of us view networking as transactional, and why is that mindset detrimental to building a strong network?How important is your first impression when building a network versus building a social circle?What is the easiest area to focus on if you want to strengthen your network, and why can ignoring it have detrimental effects?Why are your casual acquaintances more likely to lead to job offers than your close friends?Is it more important to surround yourself with people just starting out, at your level, or further along than you, and why?What common viewpoint can stunt the growth of your network and lead to your network being full of toxic relationships? A strong network can lead to a healthier personal and professional life for one primary reason: a variety of backgrounds. Your network is different from your social circle (though they can overlap) because the individuals in your social circle are people you spend the most time with, and so they tend to share a similar background as you, which means they are likely to share the same perspectives and values you do. People in your network, however, likely come from a variety of backgrounds and are likely then to have different perspectives, values, and career choices. This variety helps keep you open to new ideas and perspectives but also drastically expands the number of connections you have because of the sheer number of people that those in your network have access to. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of classes for creators, entrepreneurs, and curious people everywhere. You can take classes in Film and Video, Marketing, Productivity, and even Entrepreneurship! Join the millions of students already learning on Skillshare today with a special offer just for our listeners: Get two months of Skillshare for free by going to Skillshare.com/CHARM. Equal Parts is here to help you get into the flow of home cooking, with inviting cookware and coaching designed to introduce new ideas and keep you engaged with the process of cooking, one step at a time. Get into the rhythm of the kitchen, with friendly and inviting cookware, coaching, and guidance from Equal Parts. All with free shipping and free returns. Visit equalparts.com and use discount code CHARM get $50 off any cookware kit over $200! Resources from this Episode Episode 693: Identifying Low Value Behaviors Episode 694: Becoming High Value “The Strength of Weak Ties” by Mark Granovetter Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Some of the most intense and important negotiations humanity has witnessed have taken place in and around the field of battle, but how much do they have in common with the negotiations we engage in on a daily basis, what can civilians learn from how the military successfully approaches its negotiations, and what 5 strategies can you implement today in order to improve your negotiation skills? What to Listen ForWhat are the most common mistakes people make when negotiating and what can you do to avoid making them?What is the difference between negotiating to create choices and negotiating to reach an agreement, and why should you aim for one while avoiding the other at all costs?Why do most people only think about negotiations in the short term and how can that mindset cause so much damage in the long term?What are the commonalities between life or death military negotiations and negotiations in business?How do you take cultural differences into account when negotiating?What questions should you be asking yourself about the parties in a negotiation if you don’t want to screw it up?What are the 5 strategies of extreme negotiating and how can you use them in important negotiations to everyday negotiations in order to reach a desirable outcome for all parties involved? Many people tend to enter into negotiations with a short term goal in mind. We want the best deal, or the biggest win for ourselves, regardless of what it costs the other party. Think about when you buy a car - are you thinking about the person you’re buying the car from? What about when you’re negotiating a raise - are you actively trying to understand what is required of you to merit that raise and then clearly conveying to your employer what you’ve done to meet or exceed those requirements? Every negotiation we engage in has the potential to build or break relationships. If that’s the case, shouldn’t it be in your best interest to focus on building relationships with win-win outcomes versus breaking them with win-lose outcomes? A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Blinkist gives you access to key insights from 2,500+ bestselling nonfiction books, transformed into powerful packs you can read or listen to in just 15 minutes. Go to Blinkist.com/AOC to start your free trial or get three months off your yearly plan when you join today. Resources from this Episode Extreme Negotiations - Harvard Business Review The West Point Negotiation Project Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

In today’s episode we talk with Wil Schroter. Will is a serial entrepreneur who has started 9 companies since 1994 and sold 4 of them to date. He is currently the CEO and founder of Startups.co, the world's largest startup launch platform. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Join the millions of students already learning on Skillshare today with a special offer just for my listeners: Get two months of Skillshare for free. go to Skillshare.com/CHARM. Again, go to Skillshare.com/CHARM to start your two months now. That’s Skillshare.com/CHARM. Become a member today by going to feals.com/charm and you’ll get 50% off your first order with free shipping. That’s feals.com/charm to become a member and get 50% automatically taken off your first order with free shipping.   Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

Some of the most important decisions in your life involve negotiating with someone more experienced than you, so what can you do today to make sure you are well prepared for every negotiation to come?  What to Listen ForWhat can you do to make sure you’re not shooting yourself in the foot when negotiating?What is the difference between negotiating from a place of cooperation versus position?How are you killing opportunities by negotiating with a competitive mindset and what mindset should you be negotiating with if you want to get the most out of every negotiation?What is the Harvard Negotiation Project and what can you take from it to improve your negotiation skills today?How does pressure work against you in negotiations and what can we do to handle it so it doesn’t have detrimental consequences in the long term?What 3 things are you doing to kill your chances of negotiating a raise?What 3 traits are critical to entering a negotiation that allows for a win-win for all parties involved?What is BATNA and why is your understanding of it crucial if you want to negotiate successfully?How do you develop a bulletproof approach to any negotiation?How do you gain agreement from the other party in a negotiation to decrease the chance of it falling through?When negotiating a raise, what should your first point of agreement be between you and your employer? Negotiating can be both fun and exciting for all parties involved, but it can also be uncomfortable and downright painful. Ideally, we want to avoid the latter, but many of us enter into negotiations from a position that pushes the other party away because we try to come from a place of power and strength. No one wants to be taken advantage of so that is understandable. However, the person we are negotiating with doesn’t want to feel pushed around either, and so a different kind of strength must be used when entering into a negotiation, and that strength comes from a knowledge of what you want as well as what the other person wants. When you do your research and have options, you allow the other party to negotiate with you on what they can offer you versus what you are looking for, rather than saying, “This is what I want and you must give it to me or I’m leaving.” That never ends well for anyone. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Hiring used to be hard. Multiple job sites, stacks of resumes, a confusing review process. But today, hiring can be easy and you only have to go to one place to get it done: ziprecruiter.com/charm. ZipRecruiter is so effective that 4 out of 5 of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site within the first day. Before you go dropping hundreds of dollars on a pair, you need to check out the wireless earbuds from Raycon! Unlike some of your other wireless options, Raycon earbuds are both stylish and discreet, with no dangling wires or stems. And of course, they don’t just look great. They sound great, too. Go to BuyRaycon.com/CHARM to get 15% off your order! Clearbanc is changing the way entrepreneurs raise money with equity-free capital. They charge a small flat fee for the capital, and you pay them back using a win-win rev share. If you are doing over ten thousand a month in revenue, find out how you can receive Clearbanc capital by getting your 20-minute term sheet at clearbanc.com/CHARM. Resources from this Episode Episode 777: Negotiating: 4 Things You Must Know Harvard Negotiation Project Episode 774: The 3 Most Common Hurdles in Decision Making Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube

The thought of negotiating can instill feelings of discomfort in many of us because we associate negotiating with trying to create a win for us and a loss for the person we are negotiating with, but how would that change if you had the knowledge and confidence to come up with a win-win for just about every negotiation you entered into? What to Listen ForWhere do the misconceptions surrounding negotiating come from and how can a few simple changes in perception improve your ability to negotiate?What is Prospect Theory and how does it cause you to miss out on great opportunities?What is Positional Bargaining?How are Positional Bargaining and Anchoring connected and how can the connection lead youWhy will we work harder NOT to lose $100 than we will to earn an extra $100?How can you start improving your negotiating ability today?What is the Harvard Negotiation Project and how can you use your understanding of it to create more win-win negotiations?What are the 4 elements of a negotiation we should look at in order to create a win-win outcome for both parties?What are the boundary conditions of a negotation and how can being aware of them prevent you from losing out on great long term negotiation wins?How does focusing on interests rather than bargaining positions lead to a win-win in negotiations? We often feel uncomfortable with negotiating a better deal for ourselves because we believe a better deal for us means a worse deal for the other person. That belief, however, comes from focusing on each person’s bargaining positions rather than our interests. You can do this by focusing on the other person’s interests and what you can offer them that is of little value to you but could be of great value to them. This way you are able to negotiate a win for yourself now while making the immediate loss for the other person worthwhile because of what you can offer that person in another capacity. For example, if you negotiate a discount on a computer repair by offering to write the business owner a great review and tell your friends about them, you are making that discount a win for you and the business owner. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! MyBookie is THE place to bet on football every weekend - they have live, in-game betting on every NFL game. They’ve got the most rewarding player perks in the business and for you fantasy guys out there, you can even bet the over/under on how many fantasy points a player will score each game. Go to MyBookie.ag and double your first deposit using promo code CHARM to activate the offer. Resources from this Episode Episode 774: The 3 Most Common Hurdles in Decision Making, And How to Avoid Them Episode 772: Dan Ariely: How to Defeat Indecision and Regret Episode 694: Becoming High Value  Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube